nerdcore.info – geeky hip-hop news

I will not lie to you, my friends; it’s early yet as I pen this, and it’s already shaping up to be a gloriously shitty day. Thankfully, I do have some good news to spread, and that helps to take the sting away a bit.

I spoke with Wheelie Cyberman over the weekend, and he indicated to me that Optimus is not yet ready to release TransfORmed in its completed form. Further, he gave me the band’s blessing to continue giving away the digital holiday-release of the EP for free for the foreseeable future. So until such a time as I’m asked to take it down, everyone is welcome (and, again, encouraged) to peep the hotness.

Whilst conversing with Dub Cyber I also tossed out the idea of a fan-based video project for Optimus’s swan song “Daryl Hanna.” He seemed cool providing the community was willing. With that being said, would any of you be interested in trying to put together a fan vid for the track? Not only would it be an excellent opportunity to put the wealth of Transfomers – or, consequently, Splash – footage available on YouTube to good use, but it would also help to spread the word about the final release from everyone’s favorite hip-hop robots.

Also, as promised, here are the lyrics from the EP’s 5 tracks. Wheelie explicitly states, however, that these are the original words and thus might not entirely jive with the recorded verses, as he tends to re-do things in the studio. Still, it should give you a fairly clear idea of the lyrical content of some of his speedier couplets.

“God Rest Ye, Autobeat Allies”

My name is Wheelie Cyberman and I rep AutoBeat.
I rock the mic with Powerthighs, Grimrock and Stumblebee.
From Manhattan to Hollywood we’ve rocked the whole country.
And we finally destroyed the Wackacons.
And now it’s off to planet Mercury.

“Worms” (AKA: “Segmented Annelid”)

Cyberman, more wild than a loose worm.
Knock, knock. Let me in your in box.
Watch. I can deconstruct your system touch your network.
It’s easily done for an annelid like me.
I ran with an analysis that said “Victory is likely.”
There might be some who consider me spineless.
You think I mind this? I kill them with kindness.
Like “Hi! Guess What! I Love You!”
Open me up, and one click – you’re through.
I like to wriggle. I like to squirm.
I like to get down and dirty – watch your data burn.
Reproduction? That’s my secondary function.
Just one look at your address book, and then I’m gone.
Call it population eruption.
I like to touch people in these intimate ways.
It ain’t symbiotic, you won’t see me for days.

Segmented annelid, migrating herds.
Gather with my brethren, we crawl and converse.
We touch underground as we pass.
It’s pitch black.
We don’t mind that. We’re all from the Earth.

When you eat, I eat.
When you sleep, I eat.
When you watch TV, I eat.
When you walk around the city, I dine on your nutrients.
There’s no need for etiquette or accoutrements.
See I’m suited for this. Check the hooked scolex.
I’m through with intermediate hosts. Yo what’s next?
I gotta slow down. Wait it out.
Show patience. One day, I will make it out.
So I incubate and think primary thoughts.
I detach and dock to the wall, y’all. Shot like a dart.
I stop just like I was taught and start doin’ what I do –
Which is feeding a lot.
Not competing for slop – see I barely move at all.
It’s scary but I’m better off than almost all of y’all.
I got no rent, free food and drink top shelf.
I never gotta go to work. I have sex with myself.

Segmented annelid, migrating herds.
Gather with my brethren, we crawl and converse.
We touch underground as we pass.
It’s pitch black.
We don’t mind that. We’re all from the Earth.

Segmented annelid, do you comprehend?
I don’t want your money, I just want to get in.
We touch in your gut as we pass.
It’s pitch black.
I don’t mind that, I am what I am.

Segmented Annelid.
Squirm! Squirm!
Segmented Annelid.
Squirm! Squirm! Squirm!
Segmented Annelid. Superhero candidate.
Squirm! Squirm! Squirm!
Segmented Annelid. Superhero candidate. Zero people stand with it.
Squirm! Squirm!
Segmented bred with a fragmented head that’ll breed when you need it I eat and I’m fed and I’m

Wheelie Cyberman,
Wheelie Cyberman,
Wheelie Cyberman lives underground
Where we find him writing lines
That help to make the world go ‘round.

I live in the dirt. I like it there.
I’m already low so nobody stares.
I’m not really scared, doesn’t matter how I fare,
And I never worry about wearing clean underwear.
I don’t worry much at all, keep it calm mostly.
I already know what I’m supposed to be.
Most people never try to get close to me
Cuz they know that they’re nothing but a host to me.

“Click-Click”

Dub Cyber. Hyper Vision. Click Click.
Wide open lens, focus in Mega Bit.

Dub Cyber. Hyper Vision. Click Click.
Wide open lens, focus in Mega Bit.
Yeah I’m back. I told you that
I was packin’ up my bags.
Didn’t you believe me? Still you’ll never see me.
Look – I’m up on your roof with my
Light weight, power zoom, tight frame 80-star spy glass.
Click click. I’m never backlit.
Plasma shift for the development.
I stay up late just to get the job done.
I’m paid by the frame so I wait for the perfect one.
Oh here they come. Sorry, gotta go.
Pop the lens cap, sit back, relax for the show.
Then it’s click click. The sound of success.
Pack up my shit then I hit your address.

Develop it …
Let it soak kid. Dunk it, shake it off, toss it on the rope then …
Sell the shit …
It’s easily done, just make a phone call, cash in, it’s nationally run. Or you …
Treasure it …
Build a little shrine. Tape it to the basement wall where you hide for the …
Hell of it …
It’s really not a joke, we Develop it. You gotta let it soak, see?

Dub Cyber. Hyper Vision. Click click.
Call the police, you can never make it stick.
See I’m neat. Organized, thorough and discreet.
I judge my subjects by the company they keep.
Look it’s clear. I’m always here.
You might not know that I’m near.
Feel like someone’s creepin’?
That’s probably my peepin.
Click. No beepin’, I keep it classic.
Bad forecast? Just wrap it up in plastic.
I never let a little drizzle keep me home.
I got my tarpaulin, wax pencils and a phone.
Twist the wrist right, zoom in kinda tight.
See it’s Wednesday night, I know you’re watchin’ Top Model.
I even know the type of bottle that you’re gonna buy
When your boyfriend steps in to have a sip of a wine
Then it’s click click. I capture toast.
Infactuated from afar like a ghost.

Develop it …
Let it soak kid. Dunk it, shake it off, toss it on the rope then …
Sell the shit …
It’s easily done, just make a phone call, cash in, it’s nationally run. Or you …
Treasure it …
Build a little shrine. Tape it to the basement wall where you hide for the …
Hell of it …
It’s really not a joke, we Develop it. You gotta let it soak, see?

I am over on your roof. I like watching what you do.
I got shots that show you’re mine. Please just do not close the blinds.

Hey girl, welcome to the neighborhood. I noticed you like French toast late at night.
Hey girl, welcome to the neighborhood. I saw your new jeans, I don’t think they fit right!

“Anxiety” (AKA: “Human Anxiety”)

I feel that I’m fairly well adjusted mostly
But I hate it when these people stand closely.
Most folks just love hittin’ parties.
Bust through the door, run and hug everybody.
Not me. I kinda creep in slowly.
Scan the room for people that know me
And if it’s none then holy crap.
Somebody gotta hold me back.
And if the keg is tapped then I’m on it.
I mean on and on and on on it.
And if you paid a little more to get the good pour
Then you know Wheelie be fallin’.
But I don’t want to be the one that’s stuck
Head in the toilet, throwin’ up.
Wander back home then I wonder what
That I did to get my head hit and thumped
But listen. I can’t relate
And you better stand back three feet away.
Because my head gets red and I start to shake
And it’s clear that I got a problem, OK?

I am an ROBOTIC MIC freak
With human anxiety. Anxiety.

If I gotta speak up, then I start to sweat
In a room full of people that I’ve never met.
You know I’d rather be home stuck in the apartment
Cuz my shirt’s now soaked through, soppin’ wet.
Oh no. Here we go God not again.
My heart starts beatin faster and then
I can’t breath cuz my throat’s all full of phlegm
I can’t see cuz I got tunnel vision.
Oh crap. It’s a panic attack.
Somebody hand me a paper sack.
I new it’d be bad when the room was packed
And now I feel myself faintin’, fallin’ back.
I mean STAT. I think I need some medication
Cuz I’m always in these bad situations.
And I swear that I’ll be a good patient
I hate it when I gotta be sedated and complacent.
Face it. I could use some therapy.
Cuz I always feel these people gotta stare at me.
Sweatin’ like I’m on methamphetamines.
This is why everyboy’s always ahead of me.

I am an ROBOTIC MIC freak
With human anxiety. Anxiety.

Bring the Jackson 5 back.
Bring the Jackson 5 right back, bring ‘em back.

Now my head isn’t really that bad, is it?
My therapist told me that last visit.
And I have considered benefits of better livin’
But I’m givin’ up on it, I need a hand get?
Got it? Good. Tell me what I should
Do to repair what is wrong under my hood.
Should I pay some white-suited dude
To look into the circuits of my mind?
I need much more than a mechanic, though.
I feel weird bot, yo I can’t stand it so.
I get stressed out, about to hit panic mode.
I need help, buddy, hand me the antedote.

I am an ROBOTIC MIC freak

“Daryl Hanna”

We’re adaptable. We can change everything.
Collapsable covering, you know what we mean.
Assess situations and blend.
We don’t have to test people’s patience, we fit right in.
It’s natural. You could say it’s ingrained.
Multiple primary skeletal frames.
But you know all of that, it’s a terrible bore.
Just another unbearable story to explore.
Yeah, we transform, but you’ve heard it all before.
Additional forgettable folklore.
And besides. There’s 30 fuckin’ Optimus Rhymes.
Some took the name, others just assimilate the lines.
So fine. We don’t mind, go ahead.
You can even have the words that we invented.
They’re yours. See we don’t need ‘em anymore.
You won’t believe the etymology we have in store.
Throwback vocab, constantly shift.
You know that we outgrow that automated shit.
Let the fluid flow down deep into the ground so
We are overheated and in need of immediate help.
Seemed like we’re defeated didn’t care how it felt
Because we couldn’t stop it, sittin’ there repeating ourselves.
So we toss off layers, throw gears to the ground.
Burn tattoos and we lower flags down.
Toss Energon. Because you know that we don’t need it.
Optimus, transform into human beings.

Reanimate and shed.
Toss Energon technology.
Assimilate and head.
Hit the best planet in the galaxy.

Eh you Beesus.
Yeah dude?
When they gonna feed us?
I don’t want it all, but I kinda wish they’d meet us halfway.
See this Positronic Pathway? Step on it.
It’ll lead us to last place.
And we’ve been down that road.
Sold a lotta downloads.
And just gave ‘em away, cuz they’re easy take.
We don’t need to get paid, go ahead and burn ‘em OK?
It’s like Daryl Hanna. I’ll give up my homeworld.
It’s like Daryl Hanna. I’ll give up my homeworld.
It’s like Daryl Hanna. I’ll give up my homeworld.
It’s like Daryl Hanna. Cuz that’s my home girl.
My enemies disintegrate into mist.
Just fade into nothingness.
Kiss them goodbye. Whattup all my AutoBeat allies.
I need five with the same blood type.
Take this matrix, trade it for a baboon heart.
And how soon can you start?
But will you love me when I gotta breathe oxygen?
Will you love me when I can’t shift shape?
Will you love me when this new box stops again?
How will you feel with an expiration date?
Hesitate. Contemplate repurcussions.
Negotiate and open floor for discussions.
Evaluate and my peers all agree.
Reanimate, shed technology.

Reanimate and shed.
Toss Energon technology.
Assimilate and head.
Hit the best planet in the galaxy.

Toss off undercoated lining.
Brush off loose bolts, tell us what you’re finding.
Push pistons. Molecular binding.
Drop mad hubcaps, never look behind me.

Reanimate and shed.
Toss Energon technology.
Assimilate and head.
Hit the best planet in the galaxy.

You that we reanimate we shed technology.
We move it to the middle of the planet, no more enemies.
We cannot stand it anymore, we will not hunt for energy.
We will not remain in this form we will become true human beings.

Toss off undercoated lining.
Brush off loose bolts, tell us what you’re finding.
Push pistons. Molecular binding.
Drop mad hubcaps, never look behind me.
Shed metal – Radiator king pin.
Yank off break pedal, push it leave it leakin’.
Snap axels, need it overheatin’.
Leave it on E, energy, we don’t need it.

Today is sort of… well… bittersweet.

You see, on the one hand, Lizz has officially announced her retirement from the Wizrocklopedia. This isn’t exactly a surprise, as she laid the groundwork for her departure a month ago, but it’s a bit of a bummer nonetheless.

The ‘Pedia is a testament to the true power of fandom, and it has long been a part of my personal geek rock bible. I’ve had the good fortune of working with Lizz on a handful of occasions, and I can guarantee that she is the real deal; she is a writer of great skill, a fan of the highest order, and an expert logistician that has managed the delicate balancing act of keeping a widely popular and increasingly important community hub for Wizard Rock humming along, even in the face of countless changes in the dreaded RL.

In her stead she has left the site in the capable hands of staff writers Dinah and Freya, who I am sure will put their own unique spin on the classic ‘Pedia formula. Freya, for example, has already begun questioning me for a series of pieces on WRock, nerdcore, and filk, and how these musical disciplines fit together, which, as you know, I am always eager to discuss.

This is all to say that the Wizrocklopedia is neither down nor out, and I both wish the staff continued growth and success and genuinely expect these optimistic prognostications to come to pass. But that being said, the ‘Pedia will soon be hiring additional writers, and, if you have an interest in the finer music from the wizarding world, you should keep a keen eye open for contribution possibilities.

On the obligatory other hand, we have my friend Hex and the Nerdapalooza crew. Just like our comrades at the Wizrocklopedia, the ‘Palooza camp has some new things going on as well. Thankfully these include more pluses than minuses. One of the most interesting developments will be discussed at length tonight in a live chat session. When Hex gave me the skinny regarding this shortly before Christmas I was delighted, and I can say with some confidence that you’ll also find it to your liking.

Also tangentially related to Nerdapalooza (and directly related to nerd music in general) is Hex’s own recent venture 16-Bit Management. This independent booking agency out of Casselberry, FL is geared specifically toward supporting the independent nerdy music community. Hex is running things on his own, so this might be another place where your support and interest, not to mention your urge to volunteer, would be well rewarded. Booking and press-related inquiries can be directed at Hex via 16-Bit Management’s own MySpace.

So there you have it, my pretties; things are changing, waxing and waning, shifting, transforming. But in the end what remains is our dedication to our own music and culture. And even those of us who slip away are still tied to our meta-community through shared history, continued support, and the shining examples they’ve provided as our nerdy brethren.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

My unbridled love of television sometimes puts me in precarious positions. For example, the announcement that the 11th Doctor is just some dude makes me a little anxious.

I mean, he’s just some dude. I don’t know him. Do you?

What if he’s got, like, a Dalek in the woodpile, y’know? It could be disastrous!

But in the end, you sometimes have to simply trust the whims of the entertainment gods. It occasionally works out okay, like Scrubs‘ transition to ABC. Sure, I was worried, but it looks like everything got off to a good enough start.

We’ll just have to hope the Doctor Who changes are equally as smooth.

• At Large and in Charge: According to Cracked, 2008 was the year we took over. I had no idea. Why didn’t I receive a memo?
• The Most: My pal Church let me know that earlier this month our own MC Frontalot was interviewed by entertainment site Kwanzoo. Therein he discussed his first PAX gig, that sticky genuine-vs.-novelty-act aesthetic of nerdcore, and 2 Skinnee J’s. Check it.
• This Just In – Bill O’Reilly Still Gay: Guess who’s taken credit for the recent round of high-profile Twitter hacks? Our old friends from Digital Gangster, of course! DG, you truly are a constant source of entertainment.
• Nerdy Motivation: Genetic Anomaly has amassed an amazing collection of RPG-themed motivational posters. I humbly suggest that this one be integrated into your new sig file.
• Da DON: Rhyme Torrents mastermind DON VITO has made a collection of his own geek funk instrumentals available for free download. These are some amazingly solid beats perfect for use in working up new flows, crafting nerdcore mash-ups, or simply cribbing for use as podcast background music. I will be doing at least one of those.
• The Sleeping Dragon Awakes: My bro Super Dragon X dropped a mixtape in late December that I am only now getting around to pimping. It’s entitled Where the Fuck is Your Album? and collects some top-shelf material from the Metamystiks MC that may or may not already be in your collection. Dragon always brings the fire, so this is an easy recommendation.
• Pure Poison: Another 2008 release that I’m only now getting the chance to plug is from the enigmatic KABUTO. The great Python compiled a number of unreleased tracks into SHED SKINS: A COLLECTION OF SHIT THAT SUCKS, though the title is a little off base. There’s some good stuff in there, even if KABUTO doesn’t quite think it’s up to snuff.
• Back From the Dead: At long last, Ultraklystron has resurrected his old Nekodashi site. This means that Karl’s albums are once again available for purchase – with the whole of his original material available for a mere $30 – but it also means that 14 of his releases are currently available as free MP3 downloads! And before you ask: yes, nerdcore masterpieces Opensource Lyricist, Romance Language, and Revision4920 are included. Get on that shit!
• No Ran in ‘09?!: Random’s New Year’s resolution is not to release music in 2009? Say it ain’t so! Well actually, it ain’t; Ran will drop Mega Ran 9 this year, but other than that he plans to spend ‘09 working on the business aspect of his rap career. Could this include putting together more music videos? Probably.
• Both Music *and* Gaming: I was unable to attend this year’s MAGfest – much to Shael’s chagrin – but thankfully it seems everyone else was. Be sure to check out some of the more interesting recollections of the festival.
• Hidden Jewels: I realize I am sometimes late to the party with regard to earth-shattering revelations, but, in case anyone else missed it, there’s a Grammar Club chiptune cover album. It’s freely available through their site if you know where to click on the homepage. I could tell you more, be that would be wrong.
• Get Your Degree in Gameology: My new friends the Brilliant Gameologists will be hosting a live show via Ustream at 9:00 PM EST on Thursday, January 8th in celebration of BG Meg’s birthday. Learn how to throw your own mini-con, uncover what shameful acts the Gameologists performed on New Year’s Eve, and find out what the fuck a “Because it’s Saturday” party is in this hour of mirth and mayhem. Tell ‘em Z. sent you!
• Shall I Compare Thee to a Blue Shell?: Taking us home in what I hope was an enlightening first NNIB of 2009 is this vid from Sam Hart (AKA: blinktwice4y). It’s an acoustic ballad that connects love and Mario Kart in a manner most sublime. Take a listen, and then go buy the track at cdbaby.